I still love you, Josh Brown.

A wave of shock past through me last Friday when I heard you were leaving. Was this something that could have been avoided? Had we not screamed loud enough for you in the stands? Maybe we didn’t listen to your radio show enough… I knew I should have called in. I have so many questions for you. Who will lead us in points next year? When will we have another record breaking kicker on our squad? Are you going to eventually be replaced by someone who will tackle the way you do? And what makes the Rams so much better for you than us?? Thoughts of you playing with another team slowly started tearing away at my heart as I read quotes from you in the news…

"They just blew me away with their offer," Brown said. "I can't tell you exactly how it feels to be received and wanted that way by a ballclub."

So it’s the money then?? I hope you know it can’t buy you happiness.
It can’t be that. It must be something else…

"I never felt like we were really, really close," Brown said. "I felt like we just kept dancing around things, we just kept going back and forth, and nothing was ever being finalized and certain things that I perceived to be important were not being paid attention to."

I realize now where mistakes were made. We may have heard you, but we never listened. Kickers really do need love too and I am sorry that you have not felt that in Seattle. I am sorry that our relationship has come to this, and I am sorry the Hawks let you down. Sometimes you just really don’t know what you’ve got until its gone. Next season as you kick field goals against us I am sure that all 67,000 12th men in that stadium will all realize just how great it was to have you on our side.

I’ve been selfish this past week. I apologize. I haven’t taken into account that this is a great move for you. You get your $3million a year!! And take that $4million signing bonus!! You deserve it. I am sure that your family is excited to have you closer to home as well. These are all great things for you that I must keep in mind. I have just one request though… try not to feel this way, ok?? It hurts my soul when you think I could treat you like this…

“I'm going to get massacred by the Seattle fans now.”

I will be the bigger Hawk in this situation. I can accept that the Rams are showing you a greater appreciation than we did. Just know that the support was always there for you from this fan.

I still love you, Josh Brown. I am really going to miss you.
Thank you for five great years.

-Martha